I was young. Not only physically, but also mentally, and emotionally. A costly weakness.

Diana was into me. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t read. Perhaps because she was about five years older than me, my little mind never interpreted what she did as love.

I had no emotional intelligence to play along till my time there was up. That way, I would have a succeful and calm stay to write my final exams and go back to my parents intact, in peace.

All I knew was that, as the good Sunday school boy that I was brought up to be, when a lady expresses interest in you, shun her company! Run! It was sinful. Sex was all that was on her mind!

And so, in my mind, I was doing the right thing. Avoiding Diana, turning a blind eye to her subtle message of interest.

I remember one evening, we had an allnight church service at a park nearby. It was a youth prayer service, outdoors. She was so excited about going with me.

By 8pm, we were ready, and we set off. Just the two of us. It was a walking distance, so in about 10 minutes, we were already at the grounds.

I was very popular among the youth of my church because I liked asking questions whenever the floor was opened for questions after sermons or during  discussions. And so, when we got to the prayer grounds, everywhere we turned, church girls were buzzing around me like bees.

“Oh, Patrick ! You’re here! “ one lady would say to me.

” Oh, Patrick! Good to see you. ” another said upon seeing and hugging me.” He is my friend. ” the lady turned to tell Diana, who seemed to fake her smiles.

I didn’t realize that when a lady was with a gentleman she liked, she wants to be treated special when other ladies are around.

Even though I and Diana were not in an amorous relationship, the least I could do was introduce her to my church girlfriends and say something nice about her.

I was young, and immature. Blinded by ego and self esteem issues, I thought this was my chance to prove to Diana that I was a celebrity and the favorite of many of the local girls.

It wasn’t long before Diana feigned some tummy upset and left for the house, alone.

And the effect of my miscalculations had a profound effect on the rest of my stay at the priest’s house. I had no friend now. Diana became cold. The priest was already mean. His wife, cold. The little boy who stayed with them, cold.

Perhaps only Nelly never changed. Always warm and friendly.

But Nelly was not in charge of food. And I was at loggerheads with the food lords of the house.

My food was drastically reduced. At first, Diana always served my food, warm. And she always insisted I come and eat. Sometimes, we ate together. And the food was plentiful.

Now, Diana forgets a lot. She forgets that I hadn’t eaten. That I was even in the house. And that the food served me was cold and need warming. If ever I ate in that house, it was always cold food, served by cold hearts.

December was approaching with it chilly weather. But already, everything in that priest’s house had already turned cold.

In my mind, I was suffering for a good thing : my faith. I was being maltreated because I had chosen the narrow way. But I did not realize that sometimes, we put ourselves in needless trouble because of our immaturity, and we think we are fighting a good fight that makes God proud.

I grew slimmer and slimmer. My friends and teachers at school thought I was always fasting and praying for success in my final exams that was why I  became thin. They had no idea. And I was too shy to open up to them about what I was going through.

One day, I was so broke, so hungry, so dejected that, I had no money to pay for some extra classes we attended on weekends as part of our preparations for the final exams.

I decided to walk the long distance to school on an empty stomach. It was a Saturday morning. I still remember it clearly as if it were yesterday.

In the middle of the road, I stopped short. No energy to go on. I was too hungry and too tired to push on. I couldn’t walk that long distance to learn on an empty stomach, and walk back home late in the afternoon, without any guarantee of getting food when I returned home.

I stood in the middle of the road, crying silently. Slowly, I turned back. Back home.